Squeeze Bacon

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On April 1, 2009, one of the greatest products ever conceived made its way to the online shopping carts of millions. While not normally known for selling condiments, the web site ThinkGeek.com brought to us the marvelous, the magnificent…

Squeez Bacon!!!

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Direct from Sweden, the bacon you can squeeze comes in a ketchup-style bottle from which you can squeeze out strips of delicious bacon onto any meal. According to ThinkGeek.com, Squeez Bacon was invented by a young Swedish who found that “by precooking it and blending it in a special way, he was able to make a fully cooked 100% bacon paste that could be squeezed through a  tube.” All we can say is WOW. Why was this not invented sooner?

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Of course, some things in life are just too good to be true. While the slogan alone could have helped to sell millions of bottles — “If it’s edible, it’s better with Squeez Bacon” — it was indeed a fantasy.

ThinkGeek.com tricked us all with this April Fool’s joke. I would say well done, but damn why can’t the world have Squeez Bacon? Someone please invent this product…and fast!

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Click to Shop Bacon!

17 comments

  1. Alicia Silva says:

    part of me is really sad and part of me was drawing the line at squeez bacon…that part needs to see the glory of this and the cruel humor of this April Fool

  2. Hamlover101 says:

    wtf is so great about bacon anyways?? its just cut up pig intestines anyways isnt it??

  3. Les Toil says:

    Actually, director Adam Rifkin created a product for his 1991 movie “The Dark Backward” called “Squeezable Bacon”. As a matter of fact if you run a google image search of “squeezable bacon” you’ll see one of his movie posters for the film which is basically the product poster for the product. And yes, it shows a hand squeezing brown ooze from a plastic bottle onto a sandwich.

  4. Well, that’s original. I can’t imagine that stuff. Bacon has fat on it too. What do you do about all of that fat – squeeze it on your eggs – gross!

    • mmm… fat… Tasty 🙂
      If I worried about everything that could possibly kill me, I’d never leave the house. I’d never go to work, I’d never breathe… YES LET’S OBSESS OVER WHAT WILL KILL US UNTIL WE ALL DIE FROM LACK OF OXYGEN BECAUSE OF ALL THE CONTAMINATED PARTICLE MATTER IN THE AIR!

  5. Android says:

    Tyler,

    Listen up, you little commie bastard. Bacon is one of the seven wonders of the natural food world. So go eat your alfalfa sprouts and let the adults worry about the real food. Mmm’kay?

  6. tyler says:

    You guys are sick! dedicating a whole site to bacon? WTF?!?! bacon is food, not a god. And that bacon paste looks like shit

  7. Stu says:

    INSTANT BACON!

    Squeeze Bacon was an April Fool, but the REAL “instant bacon” is BACONSALT, the bacon condiment that “makes everything taste like Bacon” and it is available now in Europe from UK company Crazy4Flavour (.co.uk)without the long wait and the cost of shipping from USA.

  8. juan says:

    I almost knocked over the computer reaching for my credit card before I noticed the date.I cried later.YOU ARE SOOOO CRUEL.

  9. Stephanie says:

    Oh man. That sucks. As a bacon lover, a couple of friends forwarded me that article… I hoped it was real!

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