It seems that the internet provides us with a plethora of information on the gloriousness of bacon. In fact, it’s such a congested, mind boggling highway of information it can leave a person completely overloaded. Which brings us to a more summarized version of bacon and its magnitude of uses. And when I mean shorter, I mean more like a picture book. Not because I’m lazy, (noooo, not at all!), but mainly because the majority of us bacon-lovin’ internet viewers have the attention span of a two year old… when we don’t have bacon in our hands.
First, take your bacon and wrap it around your food. What food you ask? Anything! Open your fridge, and pull out the first thing you see that’s not a liquid, and wrap the bacon around it. Scallops, asparagus, dates, tater tots, peppers… Most food is not safe from bacon’s wrapping abilities. Magically, bacon makes food tastes infinitely better. If you’re not sure about your recipe, just add bacon!
Food recipes are an obvious place to use bacon. There’s the bacon brownie, bacon cinnamon rolls, bacon pie, bacon balls, bacon bread, bacon jam, bacon soda… holy bacon fat, Batman! I think I just had a brain aneurysm.
But of course it doesn’t stop there. Let’s move on to the pictures! I know you’re excited.
1. Bacon flavored vodka. For those who love bacon so much they want to get drunk off of it. Or throw up so much they can’t stand the taste of bacon ever again. We’re not sure which.
2. The bacon gun (a.k.a. The BA-K 47): Everyone wants to shoot stuff with a gun made out of bacon, right? Makes perfect sense.
3. A bacon mug to drink your beer out of. Of course! One should not go to their local pub with out one.
4. The bacon bowl: Because who wants to do the dishes anyway?
5. Girls in bikinis= Awesome. Girls in BACON bikinis= Epic.
6. The bacon bazooka. Again, shooting things with a weapon of mass amounts of bacon. Just a bigger and badder version.
7. Because nothing says “I love you” more than bacon roses. Who wants to receive some dead plants anyway?
8. Just because. You can never have enough bacon, right?
9. Bacon Ice Cream. Chocolate is for wusses anyway.
10. Lastly, art. Because bacon is just so moving on its own. Beautiful. This brings a tear to our eye.